Elena Cardone - Author, Businesswoman, Speaker | Building An Empire: How To Have It All

This is a tough question, but I've heard conflicting views on this and obviously what your building is beautiful And this is solving for this problem if it is a problem But do you feel on average that women do not support each other as much as they should? Yeah, you know, you know, look not all women deserve to be supported So there's that This is a Lena Cardone I started off as an actress in Los Angeles. I am very passionate about making an impact and leaving a legacy Trying to accomplish as much as I can with this little lifetime that I have When my best friend Goldie her house burnt down her and her mother perished in the fire It was a very traumatic experience for me and it led me in a very negative dark spiral for a few years I went out the excessive alcohol drug usage or which made me very the concept of having it all Who's that message for and what does that message mean? That message means it's a mindset. It's like lack of scarcity. You can have it all And I think we were conditioned to say, you know, you're greedy if you want it all What's wrong with you? Etcetera, etcetera, etcetera, like you're here and they're there because you're here you can have that And we touched on imposter syndrome because it's getting over that first hurdle It's allowing yourself to realize that you are enough. You are okay You're worth, you know, putting the effort in to grow and to evolve and to upskill How do you get over imposter syndrome? How do you get over that first hump? Well, the thing is Welcome to success story. I'm your host, Scott Clary. The success story podcast is part of the HubSpot podcast now Where they've supported the show for almost two years now So I want to just give a shout out to them HubSpot is an incredible tool for business leaders if you've never tried it before you obviously have to check it out You've heard a lot about it on this show, but Outside of just HubSpot being amazing they're incorporating AI tools that as a business leader You have to pay attention to because right now we're living through the industrial age of AI There are already tons of innovative ways to leverage AI tech to streamline and grow your business HubSpot just launched two free AI tools that can help you automate some of the more tedious parts of marketing and managing the CRM So content assistant and chat spot are brand new GPT powered features that can instantly brainstorm blog topics Write ad copy filter contacts run reports so much more They're like virtual assistants that never complain never quit that quickly dig through data dumps to find you the needle in the haystack So to learn more about using AI to grow a better business head to HubSpot dot com slash artificial dash intelligence Um Well, I guess the massive turning point in my life was when my best friend Goldie who lived across the street her house burnt down Her and her mother perished in the fire. It was a very traumatic experience for me Um, and and it led me in a very like negative dark spiral for a few years Um, but out of that birthed wow no, I made a decision at some point in all of that. I made a decision Um, I'm done kind of uh, uh, wrecking my life over this. I want to actually Go and do something with my life and actually doing that would actually be um You know, um and an homage to her rather than what would she want me to be going down this horrible Death spiral or which you want me to be happy? Well, she would if she was a real friend she'd want me to be happy So at 17 years old because I was going in and out of my house and every single time I would see that burnt out house across the street I just decided at 17. I've got to get out of here So at 17 I moved to Los Angeles, became an actress a model And really started to try to put my life together and and get on a path of um, you know, a new life So I think that was one of the big turning points in my life that kind of led me to where I am today You know what when you tell me that story the one thing that stands out is you had the opportunity to be a victim But you didn't you didn't subscribe to that. So a lot of people have the opportunity Did you? I did I could wreck for a few years I went out the excessive alcohol drug usage um, you know Like really literally not cared if I were to live or die I didn't care which made me very reckless um, to say the least but Um at some point I had the epiphany that Okay, that's that's not the life that I want to continue down Um after she passed away when I was 14 from 14 to 17 Going down that dark road I had eight more friends died four of them died in a car crash from Being high on drugs and alcohol One committed suicide one fell off of a balcony being loaded, you know, laughing fell back and died And and one died of an overdose So If there was that was a lot of trauma to deal with from 14 to 17 and at some point I said, you know what Um, I've got to get out of this life This is not what I choose Um, and I'm I'm ready to go make a difference for the better Somehow some way and it took a number of years beyond that point to actually start achieving successes on a big scale, but at least I made a decision at 17. I'm not doing this anymore So what do you think was the the thing that brought you out of that that traumatic period um Because I'm trying to get to the pivot point right like people people the trauma and all that So the one was the epiphany that I had and it and it actually came to me in the form of a dream where I had that she came to me and she was um You know, she was like what are you doing with your life like this is like you think this helps me Do you think by you doing this and being involved in this life like makes me happy on this side? Like like like like like do that, but don't use me as an excuse for why you're doing that Because that sucks and that was the dream and she was in the dream She was like if you really care about me you'll go be happy with your life because that's what makes me happy And I woke up like oh my god, what just happened like everything just shifted in that moment to um I wasn't sure how was gonna there was no Path or whatever at that point. I just made a commitment and creativity follows commitment. So I just committed You know what? You know, I'm done with this. So that's when I started looking at well, what can I do? um Acting modeling was always kind of an interest in my my of mine So I just pursued that route and it was my ticket out now It took several years before I fully cleaned up my act. I was still um participating in excessive alcohol usage from time to time. I've never been an alcoholic But I'm a recreational partier and I go all in on that um So but but at least it got me out of that environment so where I could like You know what it's so interesting because a lot of that stuff resonates because when you have a personality That can be successful You have to funnel that personality towards the right thing because even me too like if if I want a party I want a party and like that energy can be tart. It can be pushed towards negative Can be pushed towards the wrong people wrong activities But can also be funneled into like Holy shit. You're effective. You put all that energy towards the thing that you actually want to build, right? It's that kind of personality. It's all or nothing. I love that That's right. I love that. I don't drink anymore today. I'm just I'm over it But yeah, I mean I'm all in on whatever I do like you know That is my personality Who was there for you as a mentor as a peer when you're trying to You know carve your own way build your own path because did you come from an entrepreneurial family at all? So my father An amazing father. I was definitely a daddy's girl He fought in World War II came back couldn't really assimilate into the working world so he never did actually Occupy a job position my mother was the sole breadwinner of the family We were we always struggled paycheck to paycheck We had the mentality turn off all the lights eat all your food If something were to come up out of the ordinary like a field trip or a needed new this or that it was you could just feel the anxiety And the stress of the family of where we're going to come up with a with the money for that of the the extra was just A birdness so I never came from an entrepreneurial type background my father Could never really launch anything Um great great man though that that's we we had this stigmatism in our family And we were always kind of covering for him and and And I even feel today that I'm sort of betraying him By saying the truth, but that is the truth And my mother worked for the government so she didn't kind of Entrepreneur anything so I never learned that skill set. I learned hang on to all your money It's scarce There's a lack of having this um, so you know and and and and I also kind of was indoctrinated with The the the the rich people have that and we don't that's not us It's difficult. There was a lot of pain and agony and difficulty and struggle associated with money with my mentality But I still struggle with today You know what I love I love to see the origin story of somebody because then what their building makes a lot more sense So what you're building now it's building something that you should have had When you were trying to navigate life you're building that for other people But I'm curious because now people discover you and they find you and they and you know They consume your content and that helps them a lot and thank god for social media and free Free education now, but you didn't have that so what was the thing that allowed you to start to build? What was the thing to change your mind about money? You're in modeling uh, you're in acting um Obviously your career progresses. You start to make a little bit more money But when do you really lean into the concept of investing? Um that equity ownership Yes, the acting career. I made money. I spent money. I I did like everything the wrong way and quite honestly It wasn't until I met Grant Cardone. I had hung out with artists actors You know that type Grant with business type personality that I just didn't really associate with Um, but when Grant came into my life He really became in that area very huge mentor to me still is the way his mind works started to understand money always thought um You know always thought I was Like an artist can't understand money and artists can't be an entrepreneur. I had that mentality. That's That's for the age the agents the managers and the financial people to figure out that's not me I'm an artist. I express myself in all these other ways and whatnot You know, but Grant really helped me to understand money the only three things you need to know about money We don't need to get into that He was like you don't need a college education. You just need to understand the three things about money I was like, okay, I'd get that that makes sense. That's all I need. Yeah And then I started to understand watching him through Negotiations or how he does business or how we utilize money was so different than the way I was raised and So that's basically Grant Cardone is the reason why I'm Any knowledgeable at all on the subject. I think that this is actually a perfect Little pivot into where we're gonna go with this show. So Grant Cardone is the reason why you learned so much but building an empire together. I've heard you speak of this quite often Your personality and what you own in that empire is very different than Grant's personality And that creative personality is a total asset to building this empire and you speak about the empire a lot So maybe describe just a little bit of your dynamic and the relationship because that plays into A lot of you know partners in business men and women in business building together and we'll go down that road in a second But I love that dichotomy. So can you go into that? Yeah, because that that was another turning point in my life which was After Grant and I became married which again, I never thought I wanted to be married. I thought I wanted to be this progressive feminist Woman never to be a man for anything if I did it meant That I was somehow compromised Children Nor did I think I could take care of a child because I could barely take care of myself But I thought that that if you become a mother you're just dull dim on Uninteresting ask any mother who gets approached at a party that says what are you doing if they dare tell the truth Watch out fast the person leaves so that those are real issues But now I found myself married to Grant and then we in 2008 when the economy collapsed I realized I was pregnant with my first child the acting jobs went away Grant had a A closer chance even though he was at risk of losing everything financially in his own With his own businesses He was closer. We said, you know to run in the ball into the I don't know. I was at the end zone the touch I don't know but he he had a better chance now. I could have like said why because he's a man of those are I looked at the realness of the situation and that was the realness of the situation So I at that moment I said look I'm going to put all of My ideas of what I think I should be because I am of the species called female You know and and and stop letting these imaginary women that existed my head dictate my life And how I'm going to live with the man that I actually chose to be in my life and partnership with So when that crash happened I had an opportunity And I decided you know I have the Opportunity to go all in on him look take the risk that was my first entrepreneurial moment By the way because an entrepreneur is willing to put something at risk for financial gain So that was my first entrepreneurial move because I was willing to trade in the acting career in order to Partner up with him for my vision, which is what I do so well is visualize vision like Paint the picture the artist, you know the we could do this and And don't you see it and then I'm like great go and he's got to go be the hammer and execute it and get it all done Which is why we work so well together, but in that moment I said you know what I'm going to put all of that the the ideas of what I thought a feminist was aside I'm partnering up with the man. I said I do too four years ago I'm going to go all in on us now I see the empire that I want us to to one day have and be and fulfill And that's when that's when it all hit me because I'm a visionary right so I can play out scenarios And that's when I said grant trading in this career I'm going all in on us You know What are your strengths? What are my strengths? What are your weaknesses? What are my weaknesses? Let's look at this in the realness We're not going to divide who does what based on male female, but we're going to devise this empire based on our strengths and weaknesses You know what because? Previously to 2008, which was the blessing in disguise We were fighting each other because I was married to the man, but yet you can't boss me You can't tell me what to do. I was still operating as this single entity unit not as an awesomeness going towards our goals together So and grant doesn't think this way. So this is my role in the empire right because I had the vision I'm like, okay, this is what we're going to do you in order for us to stop fighting each other We need to get a purpose big enough. We didn't have a purpose big enough. That's with 2008 taught me it taught me empire what What An empire can be Protected against the small little hits Normal life makes you think everything is fine until one day there's an economic collapse and it's not grant Now we're living a normal life having normal arguments normal fights thinking small Not you know, there's a whole thing a whole list of line. I can tell you what we what we did wrong But this was the first step where I said I had the vision and I was like okay You know what you get to be the boss of a b and c and d area because that's your wheelhouse it and it And it looks more traditional Just because that is how our strengths and weaknesses ended up dividing. I don't know about business I don't know about money He does you're running the business you get to be the boss of the business We're equal in marriage, but in the business we are not equal you get to be the in charge You get to be the power. I get to be the voice of Advice or whatever, but at the end of the day I stand by you. I trust you find the one you trust and build an empire If you say we're going in this direction. I back you. I trust you. You have a good track record go I get to be the boss of this area this area this area in this area And and then and vice versa I'm senior to you in these areas What that did It allowed us to stop fighting each other because if there's a problem That's your area go freaking handle it. Yeah, there's a problem in this area That's my problem. I got to go handle the area. It got me so focused on Focusing on the area and keeping my area at a hundred percent I don't have time to go over here and correct his area. I got to keep all mine going so then We we had the vision right I I kind of I took it out a sequence the first thing that we did though was we said where is the where are we going What is the purpose? How can we make it so big that there's so much to go for that we no longer have the luxury of fighting each other Because that's the goal and the vision that we want and we came up with okay We want to reach eight billion people with and have them win with your products and services grant Then we figured out who does what in order to achieve that goal and that's what we've kind of been doing this entire time up until now There's there's a lot more to it But I've been long with did enough but that's really the role of what What I did behind the scenes was really structure Our relationship what it was going to look like what is needed and wanted from you your demands as a husband my demands as a wife How are we going to come together and and make it all work for the benefit of the both the unity of the two not just the think only about myself You know one thing that I've actually always thought is you and grant are probably The best example I can think of of high performing individuals that make a relationship and a family unit really work well And there's of course tons tons of people to do this But I also see the flip side a lot of people that are high performing individuals They end up in divorce and cheating and stress and broken homes What do you think the difference is it's that Alicating the resources to what you're good at building an empire together Is that what made you work out this why so many people don't work out because I was gonna ask I was gonna ask the question You saw the question I was gonna ask before it was you know Do you think it's easier to build a business with or without a partner and some people will say without because they don't have to be Accountable to somebody they don't have to worry about anyone but themselves But I don't agree with that. Why did it work so well for you? Because we really figured out our roles in the relationship. We had the purpose big enough we also We we keep it really clean with each other not that we have it Not been perfect over a 19 year marriage and 20 years together, but we have the courage to um Talk about every single little transgression that we have ever done against each other and we we work through it and You know sometimes you're angry at first, but then you figure out okay Well, where can I take responsibility for what led you to do that or what problem were you trying to solve? and And then it makes us more fortified and more trusting of each other and and and a lot of couples do little dings to each other, you know like date like They throw the penny the penny but over time like the pennies You've been hit by a million pennies something's gonna break or get hurt in your body, right? So people do a lot of long-term little things of oh, I'm gonna stay out or I'm gonna flirt or I'm gonna do this Oh, it doesn't matter so and so does it. It's oh have fun. You know Oh, I'm gonna drink. I'm gonna flirt. Oh, I get my wound But then you go home and then that's sitting with you and then you don't want him to know about it or hurt I know about it because you're like oh, I can't so then it creates more distance because now you're hiding different things from each other Do you know what I'm saying? You become Individuated and isolated and the more bad things that you do to a person The more you withdraw from them, but here's the worst part the more in order to justify that you've been doing the bad things to that person Now you're gonna pull in different critical aspects Of that person to justify why you did the bad thing to them. So now I go out. I flirted You know, I had too much to drink. I'm with my girls. I'm like, oh, yeah, you know, I'm about to turn 50 or 40 or whatever The number he still thinks I'm hot And I'm you know, and but that's not cool like I wouldn't want Grant doing that behind my back But let's say I do that right and now I'm like Oh, had too much to drink. I feel bad about that because I woke up late. I didn't I was I was I had a headache I was bitchy to my daughter, you know, if there's a whole compounding little effect of these little tiny things with That's just life or whatever But now I've done that like let's say to my daughter to my husband, you know, my own self integrity Let's say I already had a commitment. I don't drink and then I did so now I'm like affecting myself I'm affecting my husband. I'm affecting my daughter from that one little thing that it is And now I'm keeping it a secret from everyone now. What do I have to do in order to justify that I did this horrible thing to all these people involved Now I have to go back and say well, you know what he doesn't pay me attention. He's a jackass He tells he's always trying to tell me what to do. He didn't compliment me He walked ahead of me on date night, you know instead of walking with me all the other guys walk with their Partners, but not grand not grand. He's like, you know, oh, he's misogynistic like what he asked me to make him something to eat like I'm like what am I like a my time is not valuable you understand? So I have to start In all these negative things about these people to justify that and the thing that's made us successful is from time to time We just lay it all out on the line for each other in a in a space where we can Work through it and then there's nothing there like there is nothing that you can find on me That grant does not already know so I get to walk in the light. I'm not worried. I'm not afraid I have no reason to separate from him. I have no reason to Individuate from him because I'm clean. I love that I want to talk about I want to talk about the concept of having it all who's that message for and what does that message mean? That message means it's a mindset. It's like lack of scarcity. You can have it all you wait I don't think we were conditioned. I don't think we were conditioned to think that. I think we were conditioned to say When's enough enough and you know, you're greedy if you want it all and You know, what's wrong with you? et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, at least that's that's I can only speak about myself. That's how I feel I was Raised you know like you're here and they're there and that life is there and you you know, because you're here You can't have that those are for those people and that's not well. I think you can have it all The women you work with though the women you work with do you feel like that? Imposter syndrome like plague them more than men Imposter syndrome You're like the like like when you work with like all the women in the 10x ladies do you feel Um that getting them started getting them feeling that they can build something maybe Uh, because they haven't really that's not something they've ever been exposed to is that's something that Uh, you know, the content of having it all it helps them understand what they're able to do Yeah, I really do and and you know, yeah, the imposter syndrome. That's a that's a whole nother topic Oh, yeah, yeah, you know, and and and there's also you can have it all But what are you willing to give up in order to get where you want to go? Yeah Do you know what i'm saying because yeah, you might want to have it all, but if you don't already have it all What what do you what do you or if i want to go sit in the chair across the room I literally have to give up something I have to give up the comfort of this chair and actually do an action Which is walking over and sitting in a new seat So a lot of people want it all think they're entitled to it all think they can't have it all But the reality is is you can have it all what are you willing to give up toxic people a comfortable chair Like uh, you know, are you willing to give up your mentality that you can't work with your partner Like there was a lot of things I had to get rid of in order to have it all but you can have it I think what I was what I was alluding to is is And this is not across the board. This is a huge generalization, but but stay with me on this one um Of course, there's incredible women female entrepreneurs But for example if you're a woman you want to have a family and you want to raise a successful family Maybe you have stuck in your head that that's going to be hard to do while you build a business or maybe you have it stuck in your head That's going to be hard to do while you rise through the ranks in the company And that's really what I was alluding to like you can have you you're you're literally doing it And that's to think the message is very important too for women that haven't taken that jump or that leap And I'm assuming that's part of what you're teaching over in in your actual in your content in the in the conference you're having as well Million percent Sometimes the thought of oh if I have kids or get married it's going to be a setback But actually if you get with the right partner Uh, and they're pushing you toward a heightened level of success. You can reach it faster and yeah It's not going to be easy You know probably for anyone doing anything because we live on planet earth So the woman that thinks oh, I can't do that and have kids You just have to let go of the idea that anything's really going to be easy or doesn't have to be figured out Like it has to be figured out nothing's going to be easy Which side of that do you want to be on easy with a family that actually You know inspires you and motivates you and expands who you are and who you had to become in order to get there Or not yeah, yeah, I love that um, so let's let's talk about what you're doing with with 10x ladies And the reason I want to go into this in a in a bigger way is because you're so focused on it now And I I believe there's not a lot of resources that are marketed towards teaching women about finance about entrepreneurship Um, I mean there we can talk about everything about glass ceiling gender pay gaps all this different thing I mean, I know my backgrounds and startups women are massively underfunded compared to men There's a whole bunch of issues But what are you specifically teaching over to women? How are you helping them? What are the problems that you're seeing they have when they're starting a business trying to take it to the next level It's sort of you know without without being without being silly like 10xing themselves, right? Right um the problems that they're having are probably a little bit what you're talking about the kind of the The the lack of know-how or confidence or Feeling that they have to be something already in order to be able to do something For the you know the confidence or the know-how Or the resources But over at 10x ladies What I'm trying to do is provide a platform in a community where like-minded women can get together and support each other And really hold them accountable and be the woman behind the group behind the masses Women supporting showing active interest in the success of them now if you want to be a woman in business You are going to have to take certain steps. You're going to have to understand what the target is What do I have to learn? What do I have to learn about this in my business or money or finances or how do I how do you make sales? You know if you make sales in your entrepreneurial business and you can show This is what we've done and you go to an investor and they're they don't care Whether you're a male or a female you you've got to produce the stats you got to show The return of investment and then they want to do business with you So at 10x ladies we we really Curate that community and then start with providing the right information so that people can function There's there's there's the concept of being the four pillars of being a 10x woman There's the being 10x in mindset 10x in money Your relationships and your health and wellness like how to design your life So and the concept is you can't be 10x in health and have your money failing and you can't be 10x in money and your relationships are failing And I know and look beyond just the relationship with your partner I mean relationships if you want to build an empire no empire has been built alone Whether you're in bed with someone or not you need relationships to expand to grow to to delegate out You forced to grow an empire doesn't happen with one person never has in the history of the world so far So it's how to educate and power Women on these areas so that they can actually own their power and the power Means the capacity or the ability to influence the behavior of others. It doesn't say you have to be a CEO a millionaire Billionaires as you've done the capacity or the ability to influence the behavior of others So what does that mean? How do I become empowered myself? How do I live up to my full potential? How do I educate myself on my little entrepreneurial business? So that then when I go and pitch it to somebody and investor I Can have the power to influence your decision to want to invest with me. That's power It goes to that big level to something small if I smile to someone on the street and I'm like this and they smile back And I influenced them back to smile. It's about really owning your power as a woman growing it To the point where then you can then bring it home to your families expand out to the families Influence the families to reach a heightened level of success Then be on that your communities to your group and how well it can your group do around you And then if you want to go even bigger than that and you've grown then you go, okay, how do I go global? How do I go to all of mankind? So that's what 10x ladies is is really about Empowering women to take responsibility for their role for their power for Making a difference for the better for to helping to change the trajectory of this planet to make a difference for the better You all know the success story podcast is part of the HubSpot podcast network They have incredible podcasts So please go check out the roster One of my favorite shows is Nudge hosted by Phil Agnew You just have to understand that some of the smallest changes can have the biggest impacts on your life and on Nudge This is what Phil goes through he speaks about evidence back tips to help you kick bad habits Get a raise grow a business every single episode is bite sized 20 minutes comes packed with practical device from some of the most prolific Entrepreneurs behavioral scientists in the world and it's the UK's fastest growing business podcast I definitely recommend you go check it out. You should listen to Nudge wherever you get your podcast I love this and and tell me some of the some of the the the issues that women have when they're trying to build their business What are the main you know stories that you hear from some of the women that come to you? Well, I mean, you know a lot of women You know, they want to a lot of women have and I'm not saying this doesn't occur but a lot of women get pressed with instead of You're you're you're gonna have a hard time being a female in this industry. You're not gonna get taken seriously Mails, you know outperform and out You have more financial gain than you and and rather than focusing the energy on how mmm Victimized you can be and the in the me two movement and you're never like I'm not again I don't want to be taken out of context because I know some things are real and we have to handle that But as a as a generality. I feel like that is so focused on rather than Why am I spending the energy to see how hard I'm gonna have to make it to go upstream? Why don't I focus the energy on how do I self enhance? How do I make myself have the stats that show up in any office that can stand up against any man because Not that I'm competing against them, but you are for a position or a job or whatever But how do you hold your own and then some because a business owner is not gonna get want to eliminate you or let you go If you are providing value and you're an asset to the company like become so invaluable to the company Or to your company or to the organization that when you go and ask them for a pay raise or you're In thinking of leaving because of they throw money at you to get you to stay But now you have a community of people that are Giving you the okay to to operate like this in a company So now you have a a community of women that are promoting supporting backing you up telling you what you should be making telling you What your next move should be like this community is community is obviously super super powerful something this is um This is a tough question, but I'm curious about your opinion because I've heard conflicting views on this And obviously what your building is is beautiful and this is solving for this problem if it is a problem But do you feel on average that women do not support each other as much as they should Outside of your community for example, yeah, you know, I you know Look not all women deserve to be supported So there's that just because you're a woman doesn't entitle you to support what what is your value? Are you an asset to your fellow woman? You know, I don't support every woman if you're gonna go be a drug addict or an alcoholic or a liability of any kind I'm not supporting you. I'm not supporting your fun. You're you're you're I'm I'm cut off. I have my values So my values are you know, are you honest hard integrity accountable? Do you show up? Are you interested in self-enhancing and so for those trustworthy the whole thing so you know If the question is why don't women support women not all women deserve just have to support each other now If there's a woman that shows up in that realm that is like an agreement with your values Why wouldn't you support them women are so freaking powerful man women know how to flow power to power women are so So it's hard for me because I've developed this Community of women who are actively interested in supporting each other we do business together because we are going for the same goal We want women empowerment. We want to restore the value of the woman back to society, you know like So it's hard for me to speak on the other side of Because you're in it you're in it so much everyone supporting each other in your community, right? But but but women who don't support other women either Either the woman doesn't isn't worthy of the support or maybe the woman knows hey Um, I don't support other women because I know what I'm doing to other women And it's not Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah, so I'm not support other women because I I know what women can do because I'm doing it myself But when you get again, it's kind of that conversation that I told you about with Grant and I when you get clean on women Or that role and that relationship and you're not doing things to backstab women You you can support anyone because I don't have to individually from that I'm not I'm not worried about a woman backstabbing me Hey, I know how to I mean, I'm not always perfect at this, but I know how to read indicators. I know how to read red flags So I'm not going to allow myself or that type of woman to come into my Empire for very long as soon as it's detects that you've got to go out But I'm not afraid of supporting women because I'm afraid they're going to harm me because I'm not harming women So I don't think I'm going to get women harming me I love that so you like you upgrade your value you give back You you cut people that aren't basically contributing and helping you grow and don't share the same values and the same ethics as you Incredible things, but it's like what's the same common sense isn't common right these are all things that we all have to do every single day That's right and I look at everyone As an asset or a liability or are you an asset or a liability? I know I'm an asset. I was not always an asset It's no judgment involved. I told you about my world and drugs and alcohol I wasn't an asset. I was a liability to myself and everyone around me at that time I wouldn't want me around at that time. I was not like good intention I'm an asset now. I'm an asset to myself. I'm an asset to my family. I'm an asset to my group. I'm an asset to mankind so you know I expect anyone to come into my life to be an asset to me because I know I'm an asset to them I want to touch on something that we just spoke about a couple minutes ago because now we understand that okay So if women are Are pushing themselves and growing and and this is sort of the playbook for Adding value and becoming like a high-value individual makes a ton of sense I just want you to speak for a second and we touched on imposter syndrome I think it's super important because it's getting over that first hurdle It's allowing yourself to realize that you are you are enough you are okay. You're worth You know putting the effort in to grow and to evolve and to upskill. How do you get over imposter syndrome? How do you get over that first hump? Well the thing is is I think people confuse it a lot because if you're going to step into a new area There's going to be unknowns involved So it's kind of tricky. It's kind of like a catch 22 because You have to be the thing first Then you have to do the actions in order to then have what you want So let's say you want to have to be a doctor Okay, and that's what you want in your future, and that's what you you think you want to be or whatever well Then in this at this moment in time I have to be that role I have to assume the position of the doctor and then I have to do the steps of my schooling my internship My this my that and by the time I get to the other side I have it so am I an an imposter? Like the word the imposter would be if I'm not a doctor yet, but I'm falsifying the record and I'm on social media Pretending to be an expert and tell you that I'm a doctor when I'm not that is an imposter But now if I'm going toward that and I'm taking my steps of that And I'm wearing the beingness of being a doctor Like you just have to grant yourself the beingness to get through whatever you need to go through You're not expected in this moment to to know everything So does that mean you quit or disqualify yourself or berate yourself or not knowing how to do open heart surgery Because you haven't gotten there yet So I'm not worthy to Of this or that because I'm not there yet. No you you still have to assume the role first So I don't know if that was a good example, but it is a no it is a good example It's like the yeah, I 100% understand I became a realtor. I became a real I sidestepped from doing this world and I became a realtor. I know I didn't know anything about a realtor I feel uncomfortable. I feel self-conscious. I feel um Like I don't know what I'm talking about half the time I'm feeling secure when I have to show a open house I'm like or not an open house, but like yeah, yeah Right, but does that mean I'm not a realtor. I'm a realtor. I'm licensed but like that's real But but am I gonna stop myself because or or or not make someone want to do business with me because I'm I don't have 10 years Experiences a realtor. No, I have to go through that in order to to to to be able to go. Oh, I deserve it So you just have to understand as a learning curve with anything You're not gonna feel like you're there yet. I'm not there yet But it doesn't mean I can't assume the position and sell this person a house and go have my little mentor help me with the transaction or You know, yeah, I know I'm just thinking like even like on a like for an entrepreneur It's like the first sales call you jump on for myself the first podcast. I did the first stage I stepped on every time it was like you gotta you gotta you know flip a switch and like be that person Or you're just gonna you're gonna De-paralize with fear right taking every single step and it never ends by the way It never ever ends because throughout your entire life. You're gonna have those moments as always always Um, what was what was you know the the single most impactful Piece of advice that you've received over your life that you Feel the absolute need to teach everybody that you speak with that you talk to that you coach Oh Man, there's so many but the couple popped in the mind one is this is my motto and what I lived daily with every decision Is you're either creating or destroying your empire? You're either creating or destroying your empire with every decision And I mean every decision eating something that's bad for you. Okay. It was a little maybe a little damaging, you know You know or or did I eat it and and it was creating because it was a reward that I told myself You know When I hit this I get to have that cheesecake or whatever it is Every decision you're either creating or destroying You know, and a lot of people don't look at the effects of how far they can go with making Um pro survival decisions and choices You know like you have goals and you want to achieve your goals and you have a set target Every single decision you're either gonna have to add more time to that target attainment Or you're gonna close the gap by making the the right decision. So that's really how I look at everything You're living I was gonna say sorry just do you have more on that because I have it I follow up to that too It's up to you like no no I have so many different pieces on of what I'd want to know I know You you have a whole book on it. You have a whole book on it You you speak on stage on it all the time you have you have endless. It's very good But I was gonna ask for one very tactical piece that plays into the audience That is is probably getting a lot of benefit out of this which is which is women mothers Uh, like women entrepreneurs You speak about you know building the empire having it all what are some very tactical day-to-day things That you do right now to manage time with your family manage time with your business Do you block do you is it hiring the right people it's all the above But I mean what's the thing that you feel moves the needle the most and allows you to Be present with the people that you love I do exactly what you said I time block. I've I've hired people I got over my mind set that people cost me money. They don't they they help me to Expand and grow and build and flourish and prosper. So yes, I have that um, I take care of myself and my my this thing Um, and then I you know like I drink my water. I take my vitamins every day I work out. I'm on superhuman protocol. I do my IVs so that keeps me Consistently feeling good about myself the fact that I take care of myself the fact that I have consistency I can trust myself to do what I say I'm gonna do um, and then it's just Figuring out how to balance it all like family and this and that I look at What needs to be dealt with and what if I'm juggling what ball needs to be caught at that time sometimes It's my family they need me and I got to trust the ones that I dedicated to run the the works empire stuff to that They're gonna run with it and and it's not gonna suffer so much that I'm gone And I and I focus my attention on on my family and sometimes My work really needs me and I got to have people in place a nanny a person a friend come over to entertain the kids or You know one of their friends or so they don't care about me. So it's a it's a it's a it's a juggling act It's just prioritizing and dealing with What is most important to you? So my family is number one and they're always gonna rank Presidents over everything But not and every circumstance if they want my time just because they're bored and my global family My group needs me then they're gonna get put on hold But when they really need me everything else stops because that's For me personally more important to me than anything else But not every time yeah, so you know like you know your priorities You know and you know how to you know how to allocate accordingly But I love that the the the the focus on family. I think is what makes it I think that's what differentiates you and grant and you know and your daughters from from a lot of people that struggle with this It's a mate. It's just major focus on family priorities are right because there's always more work right There's always always more work got for a bit never an end to amount of work you can do um I want to I want to just really highlight what you're doing with the tech next ladies. I want to give you a second To just walk through what somebody will experience What the goal of this of this community is I know you have a conference But there's also going to be ongoing community and and rapport and and support with the women that come out to this So just give me a you know, give me the the the the the coals notes of what this is going to be and what you what you see it being and How does it serve people and what people get from it Yeah, so it's a it's a really impactful two-day impactful event where women come together a lot of guys. I know it's 10x ladies can go to 10xladies.com I know it says 10x ladies, but we have a massive tremendous amount of gentleman coming to either support their wives their sisters their mothers their colleagues To really get on the same page so we focus on those four pillars over the the two-day event I have multiple high-powered speakers including actress Marisol Nichols who's now undercover operative um to bust this child sex trafficking ring She's going to speak outspoken Megan Kelly's going to be their Venus Williams Myself Sherry Natalie Dawson who does card on ventures like really powerful women touching Lisa Copeland Women to to talk about one of the four pillars in their deliverables and So what you can expect out of this group is a very inclusive group who is interested in reaching a heightened level of success figuring out how to align their targets actually be able to aim and hit and achieve fast-track their way to success coming together doing business with each other um supporting each other And then if they like what I do and what I'm about I have the only time of year that I sell my empire academy is at 10x ladies So and and it's an exclusive group For women who want to join me for the following year. I do every quarter. I do build an empire workshop one on mindset and it's two days The all my all my empire conferences are two days the next quarter is two days on relationships how to get you aligned same page etc etc etc The next one is on money and business And then the next one is health wellness and how to design your life to make all that happen So that's over the course of a year for the women that want to come in and pursue that That's where they can come in through 10x ladies and either leave 10x ladies and like go flourish and prosper and be amazing and And then or they have the avenue to come with me on the next journey for the following year for the Empire Academy where I really Have time just me. It's only me that delivers that workshop for those two days each time To really let you experience the time through the workbook with your blueprint of exactly what you need to do to be able to have That picture that you created for yourself through that one year academy. I love that um Where should people go? I'm gonna ask a couple questions to just close this out to get some last insights for the audience But where do people go for all of this They can well go to 10x ladies dot com 10x ladies dot com and then everything else is just my name a lane at cardone dot com E L E N A a lane a cardone and then cardone is like car and done Uh Elena cardone dot com is everything on all my social medias my website if they want to find out more about me or how to get into the loop That's that they can go that out and obviously like if everyone who's listening it'll be in the show notes too So all the links will be there if just go down you'll find them there um a couple questions to close it out Uh, what would be one thing that you would tell your 20-year-old self? Oh my god um My 20-year-old self I would say um become the best friend to yourself like your Be become the best friend to yourself Don't worry and be influenced and stymied stopped by what others might think of you I would have told myself Quit right then in there every single Uh alcohol drug. It's only gonna take you longer to get where you want to go um be focused surround yourself around like-minded people and and and lastly I would say Know your strengths and weaknesses And beware of the people that you come into contact with that attempt to Attack your strengths and try to build up your weaknesses So if you Elena at 20 you come from this world of drugs, right? If anyone's there go and hey um Wins enough enough you work too hard strength right you go all you're so aggressive That's a that's a strength right attack attack attack. When are you gonna lighten up here have a glass of alcohol Here's a shot of whiskey you need to party you need to lighten up that's feeding my weaknesses I know that now I didn't know that then I would have weeded all these people out because they come under the guys of With a smiling face. I just want what's best for you I care about you you've got dark circles you've been working so hard Meanwhile, they're stabbing you in the back. They don't want you to succeed They don't want you to win those are not your friends They're an enemy to who you are and what you want to build for the rest of your life So that's my advice to my 20 year old self. I hope I listen No, I need to ask you just one thing on that because that I'm really glad you brought that up What happens if that's your parents? Okay, so if that's your parents and you still want them in your life I do something called good roads good weather. Okay, good roads good weather. First of all I'm gonna put them let me explain good roads and weather and then I'm gonna tell you what I'm gonna do with them Good roads good weather means I only talk about the roads and the weather Why you cannot get in a fight about the roads and the weather it's raining today. What a miserable day No argument there the roads there's potholes a sock or wow these are good roads It's it's it's neutral territory. It's called good roads good weather Okay, I'm good-roadsing and good weathering my parents I'm not telling them or going to them for things that I want them to be excited about that they're not going to be excited about The friends and the the family goes for me into a category by the way This is in the relationship workshop, right? You're gonna be able to figure out all these people and how to handle them The friends uh, sorry the family category I was confusing previously thinking that they were in my business people category my family category What do I get from them? What what do I get and receive from them my family? Unconditional love Um, I'm gonna create family experiences with them Dada-dada-dada-dada That's all they want for me that They they don't need me to be anything else or happy with who I am and blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah My business people those roles I don't want to hear about your personal relationships if I'm in a working environment with you I don't want to know about this or the that if especially if I'm your employer, you know what I'm saying like I don't want you to be my family. I want you to be how can we flourish and prosper and go get The bag. How can we help provide for our families? How can we teach that? How can we go out and become better human beings like and and and and and and I'm gonna only talk to my business people about Oh my gosh, I got this article. I'm blah blah blah. I reached so many people and blah blah and hey, I sold 10x we were gonna have a thousand 10x ladies there at the ticket. Yes, woo You know, oh my gosh, I got this sponsorship and they're paying me. Okay, those are the people to get it We're trying to reach the globe where it like blah. I'm not going with those wins to the family Especially the ones that can't have that all they want me to be is little Elena You know the sister the daughter the this or the that I'm gonna be that role for them So when I go for them we're playing cards and or if that's what your family does mine guns and but it sounded good Like we're gonna watch movies together or go take a drive or go get Soft serve ice cream of you know, we're gonna create memories together and I don't confuse the two I don't go to the family and say yes look at me and when I've accomplished and they're like can you pass the salt and you're like God damn it I hate my family, you know what I mean? I can grant them the beingness to be who they are They don't have to be 10x Can you allow them to be small minded if they want to be small minded? Why is that wrong? Why are you why am I making them wrong for that? It's the same as them making me wrong for wanting to be 10x You know, I It's their life It's your life Stop trying to make them be something and be in a bucket that they're not in This is the family. This is the business. These are the friends categories and I once I know where everything is and what my role is Um, it's okay I love that that's a perfect answer. I want to just finish with one last question You've had an incredible career many different seasons to your career have done a lot of different things at this point in your life What is success mean to you? It means how many people can I help? That's it. I'm on a Spiritual legacy play at this point. I've hit I always reset my Myself goals, but I've hit a lot of those. I'm healthy You know, we hit a billion dollars like I'm good on myself. I mean, I have to maintain and keep it going to But at this point is what is the point of having all of this if I can't help other people achieve this too So for me now it's now I'm I want to survive through And and be in exchange with the group and the globe like now can I go that big how many people can I help or Be helped by something That I have said or done the change ever so slightly the trajectory of their life for the better and and that is what Successes for me now how many people can I help how many other little alainas out there that weren't supposed to those are That's not you this is you the halves the halves knots you can You know like how many other like little alainas out there that didn't think they could but really can How how can I help them to have their realization to to cut Their own limiting beliefs and the chains that they have on themselves that they think are huge Chain-like chains, but really it's the size of dental floss You know all you have to do is snip and you know